Thursday, December 27, 2007
It's incredible how unfortunate circumstances can throw a person into the deep end, forcing the person to learn to adapt and respond to the changes in the shortest time possible. Forcing the person to grow up, to take on responsibilities not normally due to one so young. Looking upon myself, and my lifestyle..i realise with a tinge of embarrassement that it's been so well sheltered. I really don't know what it is like to fend for myself, don't really know anything at all. I realise i don't know how the PUB charges us for the electricity or water bills. I don't know what it takes to support a family or the legal issues involved with housing and bank loans and such. This world is harsh place for anyone...i wonder if i shall ever be ready to take it on. Then again, experience has shown me that you learn things as you go on, pick things up along the way, improvise...If there's any resolution i should be making for the new year, i should make it a priority to take control of my life and future in a more hands on manner. I suppose i'm in many ways spoilt. At least i realise that i am...i don't even bother with giving my parents money now that i have a steady income. Something i've always felt a little guilty about. The least i could do is give them a token sum, to show that i'm filial or something. It might convince them that i'm worthy of an overseas education. Speaking of which...i don't know which undergrad program i should be looking into. Follow my dreams and do marine biology or zoology degree, or do that which is most likely to get me a well paying job here, something like biomedical sciences or pharmacology perhaps. Is there a degree to be found that could give me a little bit of both? I wish the future presented a clearer path.
I seem to have found away out of the dilemma. It would appear that marine studies might be the ticket. Three of the four streams available in a bachelor of marine studies seem to have relevance to the Singapore context. The most promising one seems to be "aquaculture & marine biotechnology". It gives me the chance to work subjects of interest as well as improves my chances of getting a job locally. Problem is...it's a four year program. Assuming i get a year off because of my qualifications...that still leaves three years of education that my parents will have to finance. It means i have to do well and make sure i get to do my honours in the final year...
I seem to have found away out of the dilemma. It would appear that marine studies might be the ticket. Three of the four streams available in a bachelor of marine studies seem to have relevance to the Singapore context. The most promising one seems to be "aquaculture & marine biotechnology". It gives me the chance to work subjects of interest as well as improves my chances of getting a job locally. Problem is...it's a four year program. Assuming i get a year off because of my qualifications...that still leaves three years of education that my parents will have to finance. It means i have to do well and make sure i get to do my honours in the final year...
I was sipping on a glass of pinot noir from bourgogne...when i heard the unique call of an unseen bird from the backyard. The call resembled a rattling high pitched laugh. My curiosity aroused, i went to investigate and found a pair of white throated king fishers. It is not the first time that such birds have visted my desmesne, yet their presence never fails to intrigue me.
Saturday, December 22, 2007
A scary incident occured during training on Friday. For the first time in the course of our training, a safety time out was called. One of the lads, the biggest, fastest and strongest of us all lost consciousness underwater at 6 metres deep while we did our underwater knot tying test. He had pushed himself beyond his limit and he blacked out underwater as a result. They pulled him out of the water in a prompt response and immediately administered a desperate CPR on the guy. Some of us saw his pale complexion turn purple for a few moments as the instructors desperately pumped his chest to no avail. Finally they started slapping him and literally pounding his hugely muscled chest in an effort to revive him. Eventually he came around to the relief of everyone present. The few short minutes between his revival and his extraction from the water seemed to drag on for a century. Some of us confessed to being terrified to the verge of tears. I found myself frantically praying for his safety. After he was stretchered off, the faint tremors in our voices were poorly concealed as we spoke in hushed tones. A traumatic experience for the company, and many lessons to be learnt. I find myself thankful and slightly proud that i'd managed to complete the difficult test unscathed. While it was a worthy achievement for anyone, any excitement i might have felt at the success was heavily overshadowed by the training incident. The message to be broughthome from the incident was this, "Push yourself to your limit, but do not exceed it for you could bring harm upon yourself and others". I think it will be some time before most of the lads pick up any courage whatsoever to perform a similar test. Having passed the test before the incident occured, provided those of us who'd been successful with a comforting measure of resistance to the drastic drop in morale and confidence that spread across the company like a plague that day.
Saturday, December 15, 2007
My physique has undergone yet another change.. now i'm skinny malnourished looking stick. I don't really know how it happened but it looks awful and i am shocked beyond words by the change. I just know that i have to do something to alter it before it affects my physical performance in a detrimental manner. Perhaps i've not been eating enough in camp. I know for certain that this week i have not, due to a poor digestion and illness. Yet, how can 3 days worth of food poisoning cause my body to waste away in such a manner. OK..wasting away is really embellishing the true state of it but, in contrast to my previous size, i really do look scrawny. Camp food is crap yes...i sometimes don't eat some of it, like if it's an awful fish cake or some other awful dish...but i still get the full value of the other dishes...This is very troubling. I must eat more...Probably won't put some of the rice back in the pot after the cookhouse uncle has dished a whole heap of it on my plate. I should also restock on my bars...ensures that i have some stuff to eat in the event that night snack is pure rubbish.
Recently, there's been an outbreak of food poisoning in camp. At least 15 people have been victims to diarrhoea, and vomiting, some of us unfortunate souls have even had fevers. Hopefully, this disease will die down by next week. I was hit by it midweek and boy did it leave me in a weakened state. The platoon commander blamed it on our personal hygiene...but when it's so many people...would you honestly expect me to believe that all of us are poorly bred filth laden creatures who don't wash our hands after we take a crap? Admittedly, we have lived in some pretty unhygienic manners for some time, but its to be expected of life in camp, and for months, we had remained diarrhoea free...till recently at least. You seem to think it's our water bottles. You bring up the possibility of algae growing in them over the weekend...for pete's sake...algae requires bloody sunlight to grow...if anything its bacteria that's been giving us problems. I don't know where the blame lies honestly, but i know for certain that it must be food. I didn't feel crappy till after lunch on Tuesday. Made me hate cookhouse food with a vengeance that day. One of the worst parts of being so low down the food chain in camp is that, you're hardly ever taken seriously till something overwhelmingly shitty happens. Like this, and even then...they cast a rather skeptical eye upon you. I guess this has been a random rant leading in several directions. One: the stupidity of my platoon commander who just can't shut his trap. Two: I feel very restrained in camp and disillusioned with my lack of freedom compared to guy from other units. Three: Having done quick reflection...it's just been a bad week and i am slightly grumpy and not having anyone to go out with this tonight.
Recently, there's been an outbreak of food poisoning in camp. At least 15 people have been victims to diarrhoea, and vomiting, some of us unfortunate souls have even had fevers. Hopefully, this disease will die down by next week. I was hit by it midweek and boy did it leave me in a weakened state. The platoon commander blamed it on our personal hygiene...but when it's so many people...would you honestly expect me to believe that all of us are poorly bred filth laden creatures who don't wash our hands after we take a crap? Admittedly, we have lived in some pretty unhygienic manners for some time, but its to be expected of life in camp, and for months, we had remained diarrhoea free...till recently at least. You seem to think it's our water bottles. You bring up the possibility of algae growing in them over the weekend...for pete's sake...algae requires bloody sunlight to grow...if anything its bacteria that's been giving us problems. I don't know where the blame lies honestly, but i know for certain that it must be food. I didn't feel crappy till after lunch on Tuesday. Made me hate cookhouse food with a vengeance that day. One of the worst parts of being so low down the food chain in camp is that, you're hardly ever taken seriously till something overwhelmingly shitty happens. Like this, and even then...they cast a rather skeptical eye upon you. I guess this has been a random rant leading in several directions. One: the stupidity of my platoon commander who just can't shut his trap. Two: I feel very restrained in camp and disillusioned with my lack of freedom compared to guy from other units. Three: Having done quick reflection...it's just been a bad week and i am slightly grumpy and not having anyone to go out with this tonight.
Saturday, December 08, 2007
I suppose i should be wrong in trying to look for possibilities in a place where there is none to be found. Patience, i must constantly remind myself of patience. Time will tell. In truth, deep inside i always knew it to be the case, and yet, one cannot help but be cautiously optimistic. Perhaps there will come a time where i shall feel the need to exert a more active attitude towards this. I've finally had a proper session of boat PT... It is by far one of the hardest things i've ever had to do. I never knew what it meant to feel exhausted till i'd gone through boat PT.
I must be the most boring chap ever. It seems as though nothing exciting ever occurs while i' around. Or it might be because i just habitually downplay everything, so even if it were exciting and would make a good story, i just have the knack for making it mundane and dull. Which inevitably makes me a very poor story teller. Tragic. This puts me at a disadvantage when it comes to holding up a conversation. I'm not feeling the Christmas spirit this season. Perhaps it has something to do with being in camp all the time. There's no joyous or eager anticipation for the day to come. Indeed i know not what to do with my block leave...living in a life full of fun and danger my foot...
I must be the most boring chap ever. It seems as though nothing exciting ever occurs while i' around. Or it might be because i just habitually downplay everything, so even if it were exciting and would make a good story, i just have the knack for making it mundane and dull. Which inevitably makes me a very poor story teller. Tragic. This puts me at a disadvantage when it comes to holding up a conversation. I'm not feeling the Christmas spirit this season. Perhaps it has something to do with being in camp all the time. There's no joyous or eager anticipation for the day to come. Indeed i know not what to do with my block leave...living in a life full of fun and danger my foot...