It's a lovely night! *gushes like a teenage girl* well not really like a teenage girl. But the sky is clear, there's a cool breeze, the moon is a half-moon, but it sure is bright. And i'm listening to oldies on 90.5FM. I am rather contented, it is a starry night, and the moon really stands out! It truly cements its place as goddess of the night. Just gazing up at the sky fills me with desires...of the good kind...clean ones! Plenty of IF ONLYs... really invokes wistful emotions. Was listening to kai wen and sameer talk about their love interests...well mostly kai wen, sameer doesnt really talk about these things. I can still remember the time when i was still interested in someone, that was a few months ago...half a year i guess. These things, they help you grow, strengthen you emotionally, it's all about how you react to them. I think kai wen's found a very nice girl. Your typical catholic teenager actually, hahaha! All the best to him and his endeavours!
I think i will be happy single till after NS, for now, it's just facing whatever lies ahead at my own stride. COME WHAT MAY MAN! geez...it's getting late. Soccer was good again, i need to start exercising..properly~! my stamina has droped by 50 percent from what it once was...i was fitter as a bloody 15 year old. Well...had better get down to brushing my teeth..
YIKES! i have a cramp in my right leg...its tired. I was out from 7.30 am to 10 pm! i knew i would end up chilling with the DA peeps, but till 930pm!!!!? I'm quite shocked i did something like that, the workshopped finished at 1330...we waited till 1400 because shahid needed to do something and steff needed dough..Then we just sat down at cineleisure all the way till 9.30pm. Talking about stuff, making fun of this vouluptous burmese air head, talking about music, talking about BGR and just nearly everything. We come from really different backgrounds, but somehow or other, we find common topics of interest. We just clique so well, guess its the personality and character thing. How we met? drama appreciation...to think i had this major thing against the drama people in secondary school. I guess that was because they were not relaxed...they took themselves and their....honestly mediocre skills tooooo seriously.
I consider them more suitable for my personality than my friends from secondary school in more ways than one. But it is pretty balanced out, what made me slightly uncomfortable was being able to chat with them for so long without getting bored. On the other hand, during the small reunion i had with xt and gang on thursday, i became restless after dinner.
Another slight thing i was annoyed by was their inability to control themselves from criticiszing my style....they've known me for eons...is it so surprising that i am still the same as i used to be in secondary school? That i am still untidy? My quirky behaviour? They just keep reminding me of my characteristics..heck...i don't need that man! i already know i am like that, i don't need you to tell me that. It's called character definining qualities, it helps me stand out! hahahaha!
People with strong character are good leaders, they stand out in the crowd, it defines them. People with weak character are easily stereotyped!
how do you get a solid work out? cycle from bedok to pasir ris and back within two and a half hours! I finally saw that fugly or uniquely distasteful monstrosity created by that hong kong PR... It was a sight to behold, but given a choice, i would opt for something rustic and cosy. Rather than some melange of old and contemporary. Wood furnishing, red brick walls, tiled roof a long garden and a huge pond for a south american biotope! And this is all something to dream about, because realistically, i think i will end up living in a HDB flat or a condominium till i start to decay and they have no choice but to incinerate me for the health of society.
Should i go for that musical workshop tomorrow??? Tough decision, spend more money but do something constructive or play FM till i become really short sighted? It would be so strange if i go, when did i become an over enthusiastic dragon baby!? Still contemplating, need to weigh the pros and cons...hah! it's as if this is a life changing decision to make.
Looks like tomorrow may be the most busy they of my holidays, usually i just eat sleep and glue myself to the computer from 10am to 2am. Tomorrow, should i decide that going to the silly workshop is beneficial, i will...ok..as of 1 minute ago..i have decided that going is indeed beneficial, i don't know how or in what way but it is...and lets just leave it at that. SO that begins at 9, which means my day begins at 7.30. When that ends, i doubt i will be going home immediately. Probability of me hanging out with them somewhere is....estimated to be around 77 percent. I will reach home at maybe 5 or 6?? The exit permit office at safra tampines closes at 9pm on weekdays. I should extend my passport and be home and back to daily routine by roughly 9.
What the hell is it with my mother and her constantly reminding me that i am putting on weight, big bloody deal. Shallow of her isn't it...what happened to appreciating people for their inner beauty...-_-
Why did they have to get those damned jobs...I need some new friends..period. When you find that you have nobody to spend your holidays with. Having a spring break ceases to make sense, it then becomes long and boring, where each day seems to stretch on and on, and everything you do the next day is the same as the day before. Because they chose that job, we now can't play soccer as frequently, we can't kayak...basically can't do nothing together. I am seriously starting to hate long holidays. People start getting jobs instead of having fun and i end up rotting because i am not interested in working. What makes a long holiday worse is having a long holiday which does not run parallel with that of other students from different schools. We met up more frequently while we had school! I guess i hate holidays, there is nothing good about it. A two week or 4 week break will suffice. 6 weeks?? It just doesn't agree with me. I think i should call this the holiday blues or something. What i need is a trip overseas, to breathe in fresh air and experience the outdoors. Not staying at home whether it rains or shines. At this rate, i may have to get a job myself...not because i need the money, but because i have nothing constructive to do.
I could give some thought to volunteer activities though..that is something to consider..
And finally the turbulent period has passed. The two week exam period saw me heap loads of pressure on myself. Which is highly unusual considering my reputation as a happy-go-luck-study-little kind of person.It' s probably because i am growing older, reality bites. And i can feel her jaws snapping at the back of my head. It really is time for me to consider my future. I realise that it is now or never, my future hangs in the balance with every mistake i make.
I hate having to take exams, everything about studying is great, learning is a great pleasure but having to take exams, man, that just spoils everything. But it's part of the package, everything requires balance, can't be sunny everyday after all. That would kill us all.
I just saw this movie on Hallmark. It was called.."She's Too Young" It was about a school, where there was an outbreak of syphillis. The kids were all sleeping around with each other, and the STD just spread across the school like a plague. Shocking as it is that this is a school, the scariest fact was that the kids were younger than i am. 14..15 year olds. After doing a little research on IMDB, i found many comments which attested to the authenticity of the culture which was depicted in the film. I had always known that American teenagers were wild, but this was a real shocker. The gap between the culture they grow up in and the culture i grow up in is so huge. Yes, there are the wild ones in singapore, but you definitely don't see syphillis cases in our schools which end up forcing the faculty to call for mass screenings...While i am not wont to criticizing others and the way they live. I really can't help but feel disgusted at their lack of character. Well they can't be put to blame, in a country where everything is about freedom, it is difficult to set boundaries. What with the media and the entertainment sector commercialising sex. I am glad that i am growing up in Singapore, sure we're not nearly as fun as our wild counterparts in America, but it has its quirks too.
For instance, we don't have social groups segregated the way they are in American High Schools, we can mix easily with people of different social classes and income levels....and races too of course. Watching the kids succumb to the forbidden pleasures to fit in with the popular crowd or to get a mere date really struck a nerve. I hope my child never has to endure that.
All in all, it was an excellent film which according to Americans, was accurate in its portrayal of the degradation of society.
I went to serangoon to do my shopping. I buy fish, mammals and stuff like that. No close or perfume and what not... Well i spent 32 dollars...on Lake Tang fishes. After seeing them trying to settle down a while ago. I can only conclude that the one most likely to survive more than 6 months is the Variablichromis Moori..the rest...well..lets jus say the brichardis are frail and
leave it at that.
One week more, just one week away from freedom...well it is more like 5 days. But it seems like forever. The best period of my life is when you are studying, said that many times before, been told that twice as much. But sure doesn't feel like a party right now. Learning is fun, studying for exams..really cant compare. And its affecting my social life! ok..so it looks like i am going to start whining in self pity about my less than perfect life. But i also have to remind myself, that no matter how shitty the situation is, it could always be worse. I saw this cartoon two days ago, a dog was trapped in a...trap, those metal teeth ones...i don't seem to recall the term for that right now. Anyhow, it couldnt get itself out and it seemed like the end of all existance for him. That's when this fox walks right up and screws him in the ass....See..it could always get worse.
i've nearly completed my AnP syllabus, just have one chapter left. The endocrine system! Ahead of schedule for a change.
Bedok Central, the place is special to me. No doubt its very dirty and really resembles a damned slum. It still holds a place in my memories, all those times going to Macdonalds after school, playing block catching, studying, pasar malams, the library... It is the heart of the Bedok area, everyone has been there, everyone knows of the crappy cinema they have! And of course it wouldnt be so special if it didn't have a whole hosts of strange characters roaming in every corner. The library is the home of "David". David is this odd fella who comments to himself in chinese and english on politics and government policies...We used to enjoy listening to his gibberish. And he seemed to enjoy chattering on, and in spite of the fact that he knew very well that we were laughing at him. I think he enjoyed that too... Then there is the green lady. She has butt length straight silver hair and shes always garbed in this green shower curtain like dress. And there is the guy at the hawker center, a rotund old timer who is always wearing an unsual cap. Sometimes it has lights on it, other times it has two horns on each side of his head. He can often be found bobbing his head to chinese music. And lastly, KEN, the retard-not meant in a bad way- who is in his what? early 20s? He goes around carrying a toy katana blade, wielding a pistol and flashing this name tag holder, which inside contains a white slip of paper with the word "police" written on it. He is the child man...body of an adult, mind of a 9 year old? I've said hi to him once in a while.
Alright then, I'm gonna have a quick go at FIFA 2005 before i turn in
Just to echo the sentiments of the many many many blog entries of the DA people who have blogs, I really will miss them. Weekly sessions with simone at kinderland!!! can't believe i'd actually end up saying something like that..
Anyways..after a long day. Waking up with a bladder about to burst, and a little disoriented, because i felt so active despite getting only 4 hours shut eye. An excellent few rounds of soccer at umakage. I bagged me some goals, and took some good shots. Dang, now i am seriously considering working on the stamina and being an anchor man. It is fun shit. Marched my aching arse back home, took a half hour nap and went to study with Ummar.
So we studied and we chatted. Naturally when two single guys are together, there is this one topic...which will always somehow find it's own bloody way into our conversation. GIRLS! need a girl need a girl need a girl. wahahaha! seriously man...i never realised his perspective came this close to mine. Both finding that school has really dampened social life, and how when we find the girl we want, she will definitely not do this or that other thing. The implication being that we both have a solid idea of what we'd like in a partner. And that we are sure she will be that way, because if she weren't. We wouldnt have chosen her to start with.
He mentioned something strange about some guys behaving like jerks and a little pushy towards others infront of their girls and apparently for the benefit of the girl. I put it down to the primitive instinct of asserting dominance over possible possible rivals. A scene very common in the animal kingdom, whether you are a lion in the serengeti, a hamster or an arrogant ape. We all share that instinct, the compulsion to assert dominance over another in order to preserve survival. No matter the relationship between the victim and the bully, they may even be members of the same "troop".. sometimes it just comes sub-consciously with us humans, the supposedly enlightened apes.
Would a human be human if it did not lie? ..just another random thought which flashed through for no apparent reason and without any link to my current train of thought.
Another random thought. If you read my blog, lemme know will ya? i'm really curious to know who wonders in for a peek now and then. Not adding a tag-board for the simple reason that i dont want one. HAH!
If any of the DA peeps find this blog, im gonna get jumpy!...this is another random thought.
Have you ever wondered how sometimes, the best things that happen to you are usually the ones done with the least planning involved, or occur just out of pure chance. Today was the last....last..i hate that word... drama session, we had to put up the play. It crosses me as strange to find that i will actually miss this so much. For the past two weeks, i was actually faithfully staying back in school till 8 pm just for rehearsals. And i was actually having so much fun, i did not mind taking my time out for it. Despite the fact that my exams are actually just coming around the corner. It never crossed my mind, just that i was enjoying myself and that's what mattered.
I didn't exactly plan to go into drama GEM...in fact, it was on my 3rd GEMS application appointment. Heck, this was the best thing left, and i had no choice but to take it. Before this, i'd never even considered taking it up. But i did, and ive not looked back, no regrets. For starters, it helped broaden my circle of friends. I willing went to hang out with these guys, for the first time in my poly life. I actually hanged out with some cool people. Man....the last time i had fun like that was with band people. Even if eating at long john's and loitering around Peninsula seems lame...it was actually entertaining.
Drama has done more than taught me more about acting and theatre...its given me new friends, and helped renew old friendships. Heck, i never even imagined meeting Shane at drama.
Meeting new girls and guys, who are actually several frickin times more interesting than those i am currently stuck with in class. It is so refreshingly good. This is what poly should be like man...not some shit place, where i half my classmates. The outcome is truly wonderful. C'est fantastique~! I've met some incredible people, who are so talented and brilliant its hard to believe that there may be more out there waiting to be met. Of course it has not come for free, i have had to put up with dick heads like Timothy....stupid faggot. Would have been easier if i had gone to the other group. But it doesn't matter, Shane's interest in Stefanie, has ermm, been beneficial in helping me get closer to the other group's members.
We're even considering taking the same GEMs next sem, how cool is that!....maybe i sound like a small boy getting over excited over something seemingly trivial. But i have been cursing my poly life nearly everyday since i started school. This is the nicest thing that has happened in ages, and it's been so long overdue. It has been a fabulous 4 months or so of drama appreciation!
